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Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein is the originator of The Enchanted Self. She has been a positive psychologist in private practice and licensed in the states of New Jersey and Massachusetts since 1981.
Family Relationship Award of Excellence
My Books
Secrets: You Tell Me Yours and I’ll Tell You Mine…maybe!
Following on the heels of the best-selling book, The Truth, SECRETS is the continuing diary of a girl moving into her teen-age years. The Girl has plenty to fill her journal. The pages reveal a new school, a new baby in the family, new friends, a new guy and a new set of issues to face. Share the secret world of an almost-teen as she learns which secrets to share and which to keep to herself.
Download an excerpt of Secrets here.
THE TRUTH: I'm a Girl, I'm Smart and I Know Everything!
In the mothers' and daughters' version, this girl encapsulates the spark and energy that your daughter has inside of her, and that you had inside of yourself as a girl. It is this special capacity for fun and wisdom that we need to protect in our girls and get back to ourselves!
Let's rejoice in the girl inside of ourselves. Let's give courage and affirmation to our daughters and granddaughters so they know from the inside out, it is ok, in fact, essential to keep her alive, as they grow up.
The Truth, I'm 10, I'm Smart & I Know Everything.
The adult women's version is a delightful, humorous secret diary, written by a girl who is 10-11 years of age. She is wise and yet so innocent. She makes us cry and laugh and remember ourselves. Behind this very easy read is the psychological message to the women reading THE TRUTH that they can and must recapture the fire and passion of their girlhoods not only for themselves to flourish and be happy, but for the next generation to also have the gifts of good emotional and spiritual health.
This book is filled with emotional and delightful reminiscences that will charm you even as you are inspired to begin thinking of your own ways to bring delight into your hearts.
A collection of stories that is guaranteed to make you Feel Good. Click on the title to find out about the free gifts you will receive or here to learn more about the stories.
Recipes for Enchantment, The Secret Ingredient is YOU! is a culmination of over ten years of work and research in the field of personal enchantment by Dr. Barbara. She teaches us how to recall positive memories, regardless of our history, recognize our potential, and bring into our lives more of what gives us pleasure and joy. This is all combined with daily positive actions.
The Enchanted Self, A Positive Therapy
Through my work as a therapist, I have become concerned that we do not keep clearly enough how to reclaim what is positive about ourselves. This led me to write my book, The Enchanted Self, A Positive Therapy, published in 1997 by Harwood Academic Press. This book was probably the first and only book for mental health care providers and the interested public, to lay out the tools necessary to create a positive mind set and live an affirmative and affirming way of life!
Summer Enchanted Moments and Memories
It is one thing to have an Enchanted Moment. (I fully discuss Enchanted Moments in my book, THE ENCHANTED SELF, A Positive Therapy. We all need to experience them as often as possible. An enchanted moment can be as simple as sitting on your porch, feeling content, watching the leaves rustle in the trees and maybe saying a pleasant ‘hello’ to a neighbor. Or an Enchanted Moment can be BIG like being with your baby when she takes her first steps, right into your arms or being called up onto the stage for an award you weren’t expecting.
Living the moment is one thing, recalling it and using the memory to heighten your positive emotions in the present is quite another. That means learning how to use an Enchanted Moment to boost your mood, and to heighten your sense of pleasure in the ’now’ moment.
I can give you one example of using an Enchanted Moment from the past for heightening the present and the fascinating thing is that it wasn’t even mine. The memory comes from someone else’s mind. I heard the memory on public radio years ago. A woman was talking about growing up in either India or Pakistan. She was saying how on really hot days her grandmother would give the kids a delicious cool tea drink that seemed to cool them off rather nicely. Then the children (I think there were three of them) would all lie down on a big bed in the home that the generational family shared. The grandma would close the blinds and the fan would be going. And even though it was so hot outside in the middle of the day, they would have the most delicious nap. The breeze recreated by the fan was just enough, lying on the cool sheets. They would wake up refreshed and infused with happiness.
I think about this Enchanted Moment a lot. I see a room decorated with beautiful wood furniture from India. I see the grandma dressed in a traditional costume of light silk material. She has on bangles on her arms that make a soft tickling noise. The kids change out of their day clothes and put on lightweight pajamas to take a nap. I see the grandma closing the shutters and I can hear exotic birds singing outside of the window. And I can taste the cool tea drink and the sweet cookies that are served with the drink. I can hear the children laughing and begging for a story from the old days before they fall asleep. And I can see the blue sky through the cracks in the shutter. And it all feels so good with so many exotic aromas. Not just a noisy air conditioner and a television on in the next room.
So you see, how I have used someone else’s memory to create an Enchanted emotional moment for myself. I hope you have enjoyed this moment and will practice bringing similar moments into your mind, whether they are from your past or someone else’s.
Dr. Barbara Becker Holstien, www.enchantedself.com
Related posts:
- Relishing Enchanted Moments
- Recipe for Summer Happiness
- Using Our Memories for Rediscovering the Positive in Ourselves
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