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"Dedicated to helping you attain joy, happiness and well-being."

Produced by Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, Psychologist, Life Coach, and Originator of THE ENCHANTED SELF(R)


Welcome to the monthly publication of The Enchanted Self's e-newsletter!  The following is what you will find in this month's issue.

Recipe for Enchantment #32

This Recipe is in Memory of Mister Rogers, who liked me and everyone just the way we were!

For the next week serve up a generous helping of positive reactions to all who come into your life.  Find ways to praise them for what they offer.  Thank them for being themselves.  Look into your heart for generous ways that you can 'pay' back people for simply being.  Try to not make fun of anyone, nor talk negatively about anyone.  Try not to be sarcastic. 

As a role model, think of Mister Rogers and his utter sincerity.  Remember, he liked each of us just as we were.  He invited us into his home everyday and took time to teach us, to befriend us and to let us know everyone and everything that was important to him!  He explained the painful and the happy moments to us in language and authentic emotion.

We were always invited back whether it had been a good week at school, or a bad week.  Even if we had been naughty we were still welcome! 

A miracle happened a million times between Mister Rogers and those of us who shared his living room.   Now, you are in charge of those small miracles of  acceptance for the week!  Simmer, stir and enjoy!

The Enchantress Within Each of Us Returns—Making Potholders, One Stitch at a Time!

By Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein

When I was little I was very busy--as I imagine most little girls are.  At six years of age I had my toys, my fire station with a real bell, my fire trucks and other cars, my paper dolls, my coloring books and large box of Crayola assorted crayons, my picture books and stuffed animals.  One of my most important possessions was a 'working' toy which was my ceramic pig that served as my personal banker.  This pig controlled my destiny to some extent, because when there was enough change inside of him, I got to go downtown Bridgeport with my mother and guess what?  I picked out a new toy!  Now I was going on seven and saving every penny toward a Toni doll.  Did you know you could perm her hair?  I couldn't wait!

And then, as if in a flash, I was no longer going on seven, but turning 10.  A different house, a different town, but still so many interests and passions!  I had my hand held sewing machine and spent hours creating outfits for my dolls.  The Toni doll was still around, but unimportant—small vogue dolls were my passion.  I figured out a way to make my own paper patterns for their clothing.  I liked my patterns because they involved less sewing than the store bought doll patterns.  That was good for me as I was more interested in adding details such as lace trim, rather than doing a lot of sewing.  The exception to my own rule was the bridal gown for my large Vogue doll.  I went all out and sewed feverishly, dreaming of a day when ...

I was incredibly busy.  I had to practice my violin.  I had to read my latest Little Lulu comic.  I was in the middle of the Nancy Drew Mystery Book that I had convinced my mom to buy me.  Oh—I had to work on my next Girl Scout Badge by next Thursday.  Yes, so much to do and so little time.  I'm always at least three days behind in my diary, but I must keep recording my life!

Wash up fast!  I Love Lucy is on.  Everything stops for I Love Lucy!

Can you feel the energy—the passion and determination of the child?  It might surprise you to realize that within each of us, the child, with her energy, her passions, her potential for greatness, is still alive.  It may take a trip back in time to find what really sparked us.  It may take some creative re-inventing to figure out how we can use the wonderment of our younger self in a form that will work now.  Let me now share with you how I further explored childhood positive energies and their retrieval with a colleague. 

I was talking to Nancy Fredericks.  She is a corporate consultant and the co-author of a wonderful, empowering book for women, entitled DANCING ON THE GLASS CEILING.  As we shared our passion to encourage women to find their strengths and potential (what I call The Song of Your Soul), she shared with me how often she finds that the secret to this personal essence resides in our past.

She remembered herself as a child making potholders.  She loved making them, but after awhile she had an awfully lot of potholders.  She gave some away and still made them.  Then she began to think that there had to be a reason for all these potholders!  She started selling them to neighbors.  They sold!  She made more.  She got the idea of enrolling her girlfriends in making potholders.  It worked.  Suddenly she had a big booming business.

Here she was—a third grader with "the first pot holder mass-production line in her neighborhood.”  She began to make a profit.

In her book, Nancy goes on to say that through recalling this aspect of her childhood she came in contact with a clue about her Heart's Purpose: "a love of business and a talent for managing people and achieving results."

Nancy's child is so clear.  A business entrepreneur in the making!  I will have to play with my child and tease out some of the energy that still asks to be cherished in this part of my life.  That's OK.  I'm not in a rush and part of recovering our earlier passions—to now live a life that Nancy labels: "Fully Passionate, Fully Alive"— involves time and nurturing.

Why don't you 'play' with your child for awhile also?  Pick an age or a couple of ages and get to know that priceless human being again.  I suggest that you keep a list of all the talents, strengths and potential you find as you revisit your younger selves.

Meanwhile, join Nancy Fredericks and myself on THE ENCHANTRESS WITHIN on Ladybuglive.com.  I will be interviewing her next week and we will discuss for sure the passionate aspects of living a life of meaning and vision!

How to Order Books, Audio Tapes and more

How about some autographed copies of 'Recipes for Enchantment' with a free copy of The Enchanted Self's paper newsletter and a bookmark?  Perhaps you would be interested my first book, 'The Enchanted Self', which is also available on audio tape?  Here are some ways to order:

Tip: When shopping online use keywords "recipes for enchantment" and "enchanted self" to locate the books.

E-group: Connect with others like you!

Find out "what's right with you--not what's wrong!"  Come chat with other "Enchanted Self-ers" at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/encself.  Membership is free and you will have access to our on-line calendar, message board, chat room, and more.  It's a great way to connect with others who are exploring, creating and sharing their own positive and satisfying lives.  See you there!

Share Your Enchantment!

Share your positive stories and questions about enchantment with us and other Enchanted Self readers around the globe!  Our mid-month e-letter focuses on YOU and reaches a subscriber list of almost 700 people from the US, Canada, Australia, the United Kingdom, and many other countries!  Please send stories, comments, and questions to encself@aol.com.

Quote of the Month

Mister Rogers was discussing his dad.  When his dad would travel to New York City, and he would walk the sidewalks with Mr. Rogers, he would always place pennies on the first floor window ledges.  Mister Rogers asked his dad why he would do this.  He replied that although he couldn't see people's reactions later, he felt that he was bringing a dose of small joy into different people's lives as they discovered the pennies on the ledges.

Blessing of the Month

May you always have the courage and strength to create the small hidden miracle for another--be it a penny, a quarter in a parking meter, or a generous remark about someone.  May you be blessed with the energy to never skimp on hidden acts of kindness!


There is a free gift available to you from my web site at www.enchantedself.com/ordering.htm.  Available for download is a picture of an enchantress in the background of a lovely poem that you can print out and enjoy.


Enchanted Self concepts are now available for you to read on Whispers, an online magazine for women.  To access my latest article and enjoy the site, simply copy and paste the following link into your browser window.  http://www.cyberpathway.com/whispers/image7.htm

The Bright Side

When life is too much for you, visit my new column, 'A Happier Me' on the-bright-side.org.  Just copy and paste the following link into your browser window. www.the-bright-side.org/site/thebrightside/section.php?id=664


Have an "enchanting" month.  I wish you all many enchanted moments!


Forwarding & Reprinting

(C) 2000-2003 Copyright The Enchanted Self – All rights reserved.

Please feel free to pass this issue on to someone who might enjoy it.  The Enchanted Self Newsletter is copyrighted but may be quoted, reprinted, or distributed in whole or part without prior permission, provided the content is not changed and attribution is given including:

Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein


I also encourage you to include this material in other publications, such as self-healing and professional psychology newsletters. However, I do ask that you contact me beforehand for permission and send a sample issue.


To learn more about THE ENCHANTED SELF(R) - An Educational Approach to Positive Psychology - please contact me or visit my web site.