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Mazel
Tov!
Dear Readers, This month we are going to talk about
coming home to our selves. Mazel Tov! Yes,
congratulations on coming home to yourself-that
beautiful person that you are-from the inside out!
Do you know what Mazel Tov really means? Rather than
simply meaning 'congratulations' or 'good luck' the
expression loosely translated, more closely means 'May
your life be true to your special essence, your unique
spirit that has a purpose in living, never to be
duplicated by anyone else!' Wow, that is an amazing
difference from how we have come to accept Mazel Tov in
common usage.
Mazel is the special essence that makes you, you!
Let's look a little at how we find our essence and
ultimately our purpose in life. My years of seeing
women in therapy, teaching women, and doing
research with women, have convinced me that one
way we reconnect with our Mazel is by finding the
wondrous girl or at least energies that may have
developed during girlhood, within ourselves once
again. Of course, long ago we all knew her. After
all, we were all 10, 11, 12, years ago. But where is
her energy and vitality now?
Don’t you want to reconnect with the pure,
unadulterated part of yourself . . . that voice inside
yourself that displayed little or no cynicism? She
was innocent, yet visionary. She knew how to play,
and her imagination was boundless. She had courage
and resourcefulness. She may have had her heyday
inside of you at ten or eleven or even twelve—before
all the ruckus of growing up began: the hormonal
surges, the pressures from outside of yourself to look
pretty, to flirt, to gossip, to not look too smart, to
do anything to “be in” rather than just “be”. And
then, later, came all the commitments: perhaps to
marry, to have children, to work, to have a career,
to run a house, to stay young looking . . .
Wouldn’t it be nice to find that part of yourself
again? Wouldn’t you like to thumb your nose at the
pressures of all those self-help books and the media
that tell you to “just do this” or “do that” or “dress
this way” or “plan your future that way” and,
instead, review your own true wisdom and refuel your
energies by getting in touch with the unique person
that you are?
During The Enchanted Self had conversation hours
on the telephone about Finding Our Enchanted
Selves, we have discussed in the last few months
how to find our unique energies and work with them.
Here are some different ways that the women on the
calls were able to share their positive
energies.
One woman made clear that she was very much in
touch with a special vital part of herself that she had
even named Impy. She said,
“Your books and your website bring out the playful
girl, the imp within me, that I have named Impy. She
came out of hiding and I feel happy. I needed her. I
needed a way to bring to life again the special parts of
me that can have fun, be mischievous, be daring, full of
life, and joyful. Your Seven Gateways to Enchantment
gave me a frame, a way to wrap my mind around what you
are teaching and to give myself permission to have fun
and to take pleasure as an adult woman.”
Another woman discussed how in her early twenties she
was in touch with an energy and vitality that made her
feel whole. At that time she had the courage to do
many things that she had promised herself she would do.
She had loved dancing since she was 5 years. So
she joined two different dance groups. She also studied
Yoga, public speaking and took a painting class. She
found herself full of energy as she followed her
positive impulses.
Still another lady, who made clear that she had
received criticism from her parents whenever who
talents emerged, found that she had a wonderful
year in her twenties when she took acting, studied
voice, and took tango and jazz dancing. Her parents
had interfered with her self-confidence and pride
around her talents, yet still doing what she loved
built her self-confidence.
As you can see, the first woman could actually
bring to life her inner girl's energy and vitality that
were her birthright. The other women were less aware of
their passions connecting to earlier days, but they knew
when they were in touch with what was right for them.
Coming home to ourselves, our Mazel, is a long
journey. I believe we are helped by getting in touch
with the passionate parts of ourselves and releasing
them again. We can then harness our energies from
the past and combine them with our present energy
and wisdom. We may feel directly in touch with a girl
inside of ourselves, or simply in touch with a feeling
of heightened enthusiasm, courage,
exuberance. That is usually a clue that you are
coming close to your vital energies. Here is a simple
exercise to do:
Scan your memory bank for a time when you felt a
sense of heightened excitement and felt full of
energy. What were you doing? What parts of
yourself were most utilized? How did you feel during
the activity? Later? How can you use this earlier
event or activity to refuel your energy tank now?
Can you still do the activity? If yes, do you want to
do it? If no, can you modify it so you could do it?
You may be interested in reading about the Seven
Gateways to Enchantment, as they are the wisdom
framework around which we harness our earlier
energies.
The first Three Gateways
can be found here.
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