Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein is the originator of The Enchanted Self. She has been a positive psychologist in private practice and licensed in the states of New Jersey and Massachusetts since 1981.
Seven Gateways to Happiness for Us Women!
1. Discover and honor your talents, strengths, coping skills and potential
2. Love the story of your live and find ways to fall in love with who you are
3. Learn how to get your needs met
4. Take time to replenish, to enjoy life, and to find meaning and purpose everyday
5. Belong and don't isolate
6. Be a mentor and find mentors
7. Live generously. Do positive actions and good deeds
For those of you not that familiar with The Enchanted Self, and those of you that are, sit back and enjoy me sharing what The Enchanted Self is with Thor the Barbarian. This is a great show!
Dr. Barbara's Happiness for Women Only Radio Series
Listen to the Radio Show Archives
The Happiness for Women Only! series focuses on different age groups as seen below. We take a look at happiness as viewed through the lenses of The Seven Gateways to Happiness.
Dr. Barbara hosts this series, accompanied by her two outstanding guests: Dr. Sandra Prince-Embury, nationally know resiliency expert and author of The Resiliency Scales for Children and Adolescents and Martha Trowbridge, author of books on Inspiration For Women in Crisis.
"Getting to The Truth and More!" (20-35)
"Women and Wisdom Gathering" (Ages 36-49)
"Welcome the Enchanted AARP Woman!" (Ages 50 plus)
A wonderful discussion for all age groups!
My Books
THE TRUTH: I'm a Girl, I'm Smart and I Know Everything!
In the mothers' and daughters' version, this girl encapsulates the spark and energy that your daughter has inside of her, and that you had inside of yourself as a girl. It is this special capacity for fun and wisdom that we need to protect in our girls and get back to ourselves!
Let's rejoice in the girl inside of ourselves. Let's give courage and affirmation to our daughters and granddaughters so they know from the inside out, it is ok, in fact, essential to keep her alive, as they grow up.
The Truth, I'm 10, I'm Smart & I Know Everything.
The adult women's version is a delightful, humorous secret diary, written by a girl who is 10-11 years of age. She is wise and yet so innocent. She makes us cry and laugh and remember ourselves. Behind this very easy read is the psychological message to the women reading THE TRUTH that they can and must recapture the fire and passion of their girlhoods not only for themselves to flourish and be happy, but for the next generation to also have the gifts of good emotional and spiritual health.
This book is filled with emotional and delightful reminiscences that will charm you even as you are inspired to begin thinking of your own ways to bring delight into your hearts.
A collection of stories that is guaranteed to make you Feel Good. Click on the title to find out about the free gifts you will receive or here to learn more about the stories.
Recipes for Enchantment, The Secret Ingredient is YOU! is a culmination of over ten years of work and research in the field of personal enchantment by Dr. Barbara. She teaches us how to recall positive memories, regardless of our history, recognize our potential, and bring into our lives more of what gives us pleasure and joy. This is all combined with daily positive actions.
The Enchanted Self, A Positive Therapy
Through my work as a therapist, I have become concerned that we do not keep clearly enough how to reclaim what is positive about ourselves. This led me to write my book, The Enchanted Self, A Positive Therapy, published in 1997 by Harwood Academic Press. This book was probably the first and only book for mental health care providers and the interested public, to lay out the tools necessary to create a positive mind set and live an affirmative and affirming way of life!
Bliss is Everywhere
"Bliss is everywhere. You just have to unwrap it." *
This is a wonderful comment and I would agree. There is potential bliss in so many moments of our lives if only we knew how to get there, instead of ‘here’. ‘Here’ being somewhere that is less than blissful. One way to get ‘there’ is to use our memories to retrieve old blissful moments that can be enjoyed for themselves and used to create new moments. I talk about this extensively in THE ENCHANTED SELF, APositive Therapy . Sometimes these moments are our own. Sometimes they belong to someone else and we borrow them.
Yesterday I was talking to my mom’s best friend from childhood. My mom, Bernice Becker is the author of FEEL GOOD STORIES. This book is full of great memories, but not the one that Betty shared. She told me about how they would spend the summers as youngsters. There was no money for camp in either family but the two girls had a great time rollerskating and going back and forth to the public library. They lived in Brookline, Massachusetts on tree lined streets filled with small apartment buildings and three family homes. Most apartments had small porches either in the front facing the street or in the back facing an alleyway or yard. It wasn’t heaven but it was pleasant. The weather was hot but not as unbearable as weather can be today and they had freedom, exercise and the next good book to read. Yes, bliss was everywhere those summers. And it was sweet.
How I wish we could all unwrap our bliss everyday! And I wish so much that could be true for my mom who is now in Skilled Nursing and those days of roller skating and even the pleasure of a good novel are so far behind.
*By the way I heard that saying on tv this morning. It goes with an ad for a new Hersey chocolate! I guess a good piece of chocolate is another way back to bliss! I could recreate a blissful moment right now by eating a chocolate. I remember how wonderful chocolate tasted when I was a girl, hungry in girl scout camp and we made Smore’s. Should I? Shouldn’t I? mmm This is a big decision.
Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, www.enchantedself.com
Kids, Tweens and Teens, A Positive Psychologist Looks at All Three!-radio show
MEDIA ALERT
Who: Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein will interview Andrea Fuller, CEO of Work It! Inc., and creator of Work It! Book Collection, is a veterinarian at Seaside Zoo in San Francisco. The mission of her books is to encourage girls to think BIG about the future and have fun! Her books are geared for girls 7 – 14 years old.
The first book in the Work It! Book Collection, fiction book series, introduces an internship program called the Work It Club for girls in San Francisco. The Work It Club places girls in jobs with professional women to learn about what they do. It features real details about the profession highlighted in each book. The storyline includes, Bella Santi and Sierra Christmas getting an internship with Dr. Lopez at the Seaside Zoo.
What: Under “Kids, Tweens and Teens, A Positive Psychologist Looks at all Three,” Dr. Barbara will speak to Andrea on girls growing up, keeping their aspirations and drive toward careers, happiness and more. Dr. Barbara will critical issues that can interfere with a girl holding on to her dreams, such as bullying, poor parenting, gossiping, and lack of mentors. Andrea will share how her books help to correct some of the above by providing mentors and encouragement.
When: Live 4:30pm EDT Monday, at internetvoicesradio.com.
Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein is the author of The Truth, (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything). A National Best Seller for Teens, The Truth is a fictional girl’s diary that with humor and pathos takes all the above issues into account.
For more information please contact Dr. Holstein at 732-571-1200 or encself@aol.com For more information about Work It! Please log onto www.workitclub.com
The Older We Get The Happier We Are-Yes if we bother to practice happiness techniques!
|
U.S. study: The older, the happier
|
www.chinaview.cn  2008-04-21 10:06:29 |
  Print |
|
BEIJING, April 21 (Xinhuanet) — People usually think late life is far from the best stage of life, but a new research in April’s American Sociological Review said the happiest Americans are the oldest. This eye-opening research was conducted by Yang Yang, a University of Chicago sociologist. "The good news is that with age comes happiness," Yang said: "Life gets better in one’s perception as one ages." People in old age face a certain amount of inevitable distresses, including aches and pains and the deaths of loved ones and friends. But older people generally have learned to be more content with what they have than younger adults, Yang said. "Partly because older people have learned to lower their expectations, and they accept their achievements," said Duke University aging expert Linda George: "it’s fine that I was a schoolteacher and not a Nobel Prize winner." Yang’s findings are based on periodic face-to-face interviews with a nationally representative sample of Americans from 1972 to 2004. About 28,000 people ages 18 to 88 took part. There were ups and downs in overall happiness levels during the study, generally corresponding with good and bad economic times. But at every stage, older Americans are the happier ones. In general, the odds of being happy increase 5 percent with every 10 years of age. (Agencies) |
| Editor: Sun Yunlo |
This is fascinating research. In general I agree with the above conclusions posted in Cnina View. As a positive psychologist I believe that it takes practice to be contented with one’s life and to experience a sense of well-being that didn’t involve fame, fortune or a body without cellulite. Of course, there is a good chance that older people get more chances at practice,. Certainly they have been alive longer! What I find is that there comes a time in most people’s lives that they begin to relax into what the universe seems to have dished out to them. If they perceive this serving of life as basically a glass half full, they feel good about themselves and experience good feelings which are often interpreted as ‘happiness’. If they see their serving of life as lousy, they often see the glass as half empty and miss many pleasant opportunities. Here is where practice comes in.
I am older and I have intentionally been practicing being in the ‘now’ and seeing the glass as half full. I can tell you it is worth doing! The other day I went outside and not only hugged the tree on my front lawn but let it hug me with its two lowest branches. And then we rocked slightly in a very light wind. I can tell you it was pure pleasure. I could feel the energy of life in that tree. And I could feel the contentment build as we moved slowing together. It was an incredible few moments. And then I went inside, happy and content and loved at least for the moment by a tree.
Letting a tree hug me was intentional practice. Let me know what you practice to increase the experience of happiness! Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, Positive Psychologist and Happiness Coach, www.enchantedself.com
reading mama blog reviews The Truth, (I'm a girl, I'm smart and I know everythng)
"I am very excited that my daughter read The Truth and wrote a review about it. She is 11 years old just the right age for this book. When she completed reading it she said it was cool and that she could relate to the girl. Here is her complete review:
Thanks for the review! Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, www.enchanteself.com
Being in the NOW-How Sweet That Can Be!
A few days ago I lost my sense of smell. Suddenly, in the middle of a violent head cold it was gone. I realized that not only was I miserable but I couldn’t smell a thing, not even Vick’s. Some of that was good news. Wow, the kitty litter box seemed so clean-no aroma at all. But that news grew cold as I reminded myself that I couldn’t even smell unpleasant odors. Over the next two days I was keenly aware of loss. I thought a lot about how important my sense of smell has been all these years. It had been my best friend so many times-every spring when certain frangrances such as honeysuckle return, uplifting my mood by so many aromas -cinnamon, peppermint, fresh grass, chicken soup, musk perfumes, clean hair, even sweat. Panic almost begins to set in. I need my sense of smell. I’m not ready to say good-bye. It is becoming more precious by the moment. I resist picking up the lavender soup and seeing that I still can’t smell.
Fast forward-my sense of smell is back! Oh, sweet relief. I am leaning over my chicken soup-still simmering- and I can smell it again. I am still stuffed but I am in wondrous awe of the trickle of aroma making its way through my passages. I realize I am in the Now. I am in love with the smell of chicken soup. I am in love with my bathroom soap. I am in love with kitty litter. Well, not really in love, but appreciative.
The moment is passing. But I can say that I am so thankful. This is what feeling grateful really feels like. Not making a list when I wake up in the morning-nice idea but not passionate enough for me. This is pure gratitude, coming from the return of the most primitive sense we have, the one that is the gateway to so many of our memories. I love you, I love you, I love you. Stay with me forever. I will treat you, (my ability to smell) with respect and awe. I promise.
Meanwhile, life goes on- I guess I have to change the kitty litter.
Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, www.enchantedself.com and author of The Truth, (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything)
We Can't Dance at Two Weddings!
This expression, We Can’t Dance at Two Weddings is simple yet elegant. No one can truly do two things at once, even if both are wonderful and engaging. All of life is deciding which is the road to take and which will be the road not taken. And those of us who can be happy with the choice really do get to dance at the wedding!
Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, www.enchantedself.com
Simple But Profound-The Truth, I'm a girl, I'm smart and I know everything. What do you think?
 THE TRUTH, Simple but Profound,
THE TRUTH, is simple and yet profound. The diary of a girl’s most personal thoughts is a compelling perspective on intimate childhood feelings with an intelligent resolve to the challenges of growing up. This delightful manner of story-telling exudes youthful innocence, yet timeless wisdom. It is within the context of this constant flux, that we can find relevance to our own self-awareness as adults. Intended for nine to twelve year olds but appropriate for all generations; THE TRUTH allows us to renew those youthful ideals as we reflect on our "girl’s" heartfelt experiences. THE TRUTH offers an opportunity to connect to our daughters and granddaughters in an open and honest dialogue, and permission to have fun. I thought you would enjoy seeing what another reader had to say about The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything). I hope soon you will be sharing your thoughts and ideas. And kids, tweens and teens, I really want to hear from you! Free Truth necklace to any person under 21 who takes the time to read the book, and write a review. Just be in touch with me at www.enchantedself.com or encself@aol.com Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein |
Purity of Heart is Very Important
The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything) has so many topics imbedded into it for mothers and daughters and anyone who has walked the path of growing up as a girl that I hardly know which to pick. But since I must pick-let me pick purity of heart.
Purity of heart is in my opinion as a woman, a positive psychologist and having been a girl, a special vision that we often have in childhood. It is not just seeing with our eyes. It is a sixth sense combined with tender feelings and acute awareness of our surroundings. For example, when Laura Ingalls describes to us the way she ran through the prairie grass and looked up into the sky to follow hawks and looked at the stars at night while her father played the fiddle, her words evoke a purity of heart sensation in even adults.
She was able as a writer to create the whole atmosphere of her life on the prairie so that we feel something new and fresh and yet eternal as we read The Little House on the Prairie. In The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything) I have tried to capture the same sense of purity of heart.
When the ‘girl’ is upset when her cousin swears it isn’t because she is making a moral judgment. It is because the swear words just feel bad as they hit her across the room. And when she dances with her mother up in the bedroom to rock and roll music, the relief of connecting with her mom and the pleasure of moving, laughing and hugging together is all there is. This is the moment and it is pure.
Purity of heart is a clean feeling and when we have purity of heart moments we can feel cleansed and delighted at the same time. Or if they are upsetting moments, as when the ‘girl’s’ cousin swore at least she knew he was not right and there was some relief just in the expression of her emotions.
I wanted to incorporate purity of heart into The Truth as we at all ages need to remember the intense pure feelings of childhood, both for ourselves and for the next generation. We need to remember them for ourselves so we can go there once again and experience the sweetness and passion that goes with really being alive, not just sleepwalking as sometimes we do as grown-ups.
And for the next generation’s sake we need to remember because we need to connect with our children and grandchildren and we need to reassure them and help validate for them that their emotions are not only pure but often more in tune with what is right that we are. Aging is not necessarily becoming emotionally more astute. Aging can sometimes just be aging.
The Truth (I’m a girl, I’m smart and I know everything) has many themes and one of them is most certainly don’t sleepwalk. Stay alive as you age and let the kids you know refresh you as well as the kid you were. After all, she is still inside of you! I promise and that’s the truth!
By the way, this write-up I just did is now appearing on The Book Stacks blog. Go and take a look-it is a wonderful blog. Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, www.enchantedself.com
-
THE TRUTH: I'm a Girl, I'm Smart and I Know Everything!
- THE ENCHANTED SELF PART OF OURSELVES-FIND IT! (PART ONE)
- I recently found an excerpt from The Enchanted Self, A Positive Therapy. This section reveals the way that I initially began to reclaim my own Enchanted Self:
- Diary Entries
- WE CAN NEVER RECEIVE TOO MANY BLESSINGS. Here are some from Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, Positive Psychologist
- Blessings
- Books
- Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein
- Dr. Holstein's Podcast Archives
- Financial Stress
- Fond Memories that Enhance Happy Feelings
- happiness
- In the News
- Inspirational True Stories
- Positive Psychology
- Positive Psychology for Women
- Positive Psychology, Kids, Tweens and Teens
- Positive use of Memory
- Published Articles
- Recipe for Enchantment
- Recipe For Happiness
- self-esteem
- The Enchanted Self
- The Truth, I'm a girl, I'm smart and I know everything
- THE TRUTH, I'm Ten, I'm Smart and I Know Everything!
- Tweens
- Uncategorized
- Utilizing Positive Psychology Concepts
- Valentine's Day
- Video
- Virtual Book Tour
- Weekly Podcast
- Wisdom Thoughts
- Women and Friendship
- Women's Happiness
- Worry
Daughters' and Moms' edition: The Truth, I'm 10, I'm Smart & I Know Everything
Adult Women's Edition
Dr. Barbara publishes frequent Newsletters and Blessings. Subscribe NOW and Receive FREE:Dr. Barbara's "Seven Gateways To Enchantment" |
